A few weeks ago I was watching ‘family brain games’ and over the last week I’ve been watching some doubles tennis. The thing that was clear in both of these was the sense of teamship (I don’t care that it’s not a word). In the family brain games the families that did well were those that encouraged each other in all aspects, whether they had won a game or not, they would find the positive from the experience and would make sure all had recognised it. That isn’t to say they weren’t upset at losing but that they would strive to move forward together. In the doubles tennis most pairs will bump fists, or slap hands after every single point has been played. It doesn’t matter whether they have won or lost the point they are recognising that they are a team, playing together.
Two weeks ago I had an appointment. For that appointment I had to fill out a questionnaire about how I had been feeling etc… there were a number of questions which I had to rate saying whether I had never experienced it through to experiencing it all the time. For most questions I was somewhere in the middle, but for one I was able to say never. That question was along the lines ‘I have felt completely alone and unable to talk to anyone’. There was another similar one which I was able to answer always to and that was something like ‘I have felt supported by other people’.
It is fair to say the last month has been rubbish, with the loss of two members of family, a lot of major changes at work, and my brain still not being happy. I have been at some of the lowest points I have ever been at – and I hate it! However, as E keeps reminding me – and I mean it, she is ridiculously persistent with it – she, and many others are on team H. I know that I am surrounded by people who are supporting me, being there in the tears (of which there are many), holding my hand when I’m shaky, giving me the fist bump of encouragement when all I can see is the failure.
I have witnessed the importance of having a team in things I have watched, as well as my own experiences over the last few weeks. And as I’m studying the Trinity with one of the groups I teach I am reminded that we are created to be in relationship, with one another as well as with God. We all need a team around us, sometimes we will be giving to that team but at other times we will need to receive. During my darkest times over the last month, which I am sure will occur again, the one thing that has caused me to cry as well as fill my heart with warmth is those times during my doubts when I receive a text from E saying ‘remember I’m on team H’.